My Dachshund Hogs the Bed, Does Yours?
My Dachshunds sleep in the bed with me and, after my dog waking me up at 4 am again, I got up and decided to take my frustration out by drawing a diagram of it.
I have no drawing skills, and no experience drawing in Word Paint, and I literally put zero real effort in.
I think my drawings turned out hilarious and, given how they went viral on the internet after I published them, and how many scammers slightly altered my design to sell on T-shirts (stealing my drawing is legal if they change 10% of it), a lot of other people did too.
Ten years after I put my drawings out into the world (Dec 4, 2012), I still frequently run into them on Pinterest or being shared in Dachshund groups.
And, although I tried to fight the T-shirt scammers, I still occasionally see unscrupulous people profiting off of my design with their ever-so-slightly altered version.
But that is the way the internet cookie crumbles I guess.
My hope is that I’m anonymously making Dachshund owners everywhere smile.
Anyway, back to my Dachshunds sleeping with me, hogging the bed, and waking me up at night.
Should My Dachshunds Sleep in My Bed?
Believe me, sometimes I wonder if I should let my Dachshunds sleep in my bed.
Especially for the last couple years of my first Dachshund’s life when he had dog dementia.
But you’ll notice, in my raw, honest, delirious state, all of my drawings have a smiley face on them.
You see, my best friend as a child was a cat and she slept with me every night.
So, first, because miniature Dachshunds are warm, fuzzy, and cat-sized, it’s a comforting feeling that brings back happy memories when they sleep in my bed.
Second, my cat used to sleep on my face. Why do cats love to do that?
I don’t know, but it “trained” me to get used to animals eschewing the rest of the bed to touch me and encroach on my space.
While it would be less likely that my dogs wake me up at 4 am if they didn’t sleep with me, I feel like I wouldn’t sleep as good without my “comfort weenies”.
They relax me and bring be peace.
Also, now that my Dachshunds are used to sleeping in my bed, training them to sleep somewhere else, like in a crate, would be like starting all over with a puppy.
How Can a Little Dog Take Up So Much Space?
I frequently wonder how a dog so small could take up so much space.
And, of course, I try my hardest to not disturb their sleep so I contort myself strange ways as to not make them move.
But seriously, they have a lot of space to spread out.
Instead, they want me to spoon them, love to sleep sideways between me and my hubby as sort of a “spacer”, and sprawl out to take up more space than seems possible.
My Dogs Snore Too
The day after we adopted our second Dachshund Gretel, my Hubby woke me up snoring loudly.
I literally jolted awake and glared at him from my pillow.
He thought I was snoring so did the same.
Both of our eyes landed on Gretel, laying in between us on her back with her head peacefully resting on the pillow like a little person!
She’d found our joy with us (and this little rescue went on to completely change the trajectory of my life).
I think it’s a combination of my “motherly instinct”, and my desire to not wake up and find pee on the floor, but if I hear one peep out of either Dachshund, I think it’s them waiting at the bedroom door to get out.
But, more often than not, I jolt awake to find them peacefully snoring away.
It’s 100% true that sleeping with my Dachshunds occasionally result in a sleepless night or an earlier-than-desired wake up call.
But it brings back happy childhood memories for me and it feels wrong when I have to sleep without them.
While my first Dachshund slept me on and off over the years according to a current boyfriend’s preference, I long ago decided that their right place is spooning up next to me in bed and snoring on my pillow.
About the Author
Hi, I’m Jessica. I’ve been studying the Dachshund breed since 2007, owned 3 of my own, and shared in the lives of thousands of others through their owner’s stories. When I’m not sharing what I know on this blog, you can find me hiking, camping, and traveling with my adventurous wiener dogs.
Woof! Woof! Golden LAUGHS!!! Great ‘stick’ drawings. Lucky pups that they get to sleep in your bed. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar
Do the pups switch positions or do they each have their own regular spot?
The one moving around in the drawings between us is Gretel. Chester almost always sticks to my side.
I think you did a great job. I especially like the one that is in the middle. As of a few days ago I was sleeping with five. RIP Zeus.
My thoughts are with you….
Awww…I am sorry. I had a friend who just lost his two the other day too. My heart goes out to you.
I think your drawings are cute. Roxy gets in bed on my side about 3 or 4 in the AM. Torrey, thankfully is on the floor in her bed.
Especially like the upside-down smiling doggie in #2! Which one does that? (Of course, inquiring minds want to know this intimate de-tail)
That’s Gretel 🙂
Great job there. We sleep at the bottom of the bed where we slept as a puppy. However when no one is there it is a different story. Have a terrific Tuesday.
Best wishes Molly
That is awesome drawing and shows quite well how they sleep. Now add 2 more to that and it will show how I sleep with 4 chesapeakes. Have a great day.
4 BIG DOGS? Yikes. ha, ha. You must have a king size bed 🙂 We have slept with up to 6 Doxies at once when we were babysitting. Space wasn’t the biggest issue. It was that, with 6, there was always someone who wasn’t ready to go to sleep and would rile the others up.
This drawing spells out the truth about our bed with three Dachshunds and a Beagle! Picture’s worth a thousand words!
The things we do for them huh? I sacrifice my comfort for theirs 🙂
Yes for sure! I’m pretty sure that none of us would have it any other way, would we! Btw, I love your blog!
I think the drawings are terrific; love seeing the different positions and Gretel’s movement. This reinforces why I go to a motel about 3-4 times a year to sleep soundly :).
Ha, ha. I am not sure if I sleep more soundly with them or without them. I grew up sleeping with a cat so sleeping with warm fuzzy things with a heartbeat is a “comfort” thing. Without it I don’t think I sleep as well. However, they get me up at 5 am every morning to be fed and sometimes they wake me one or two other times just because….so when I sleep alone it is usually uninterrupted…so maybe better? 🙂
Ha! Hilarious! We mostly don’t sleep with our dog because no one, including her, really gets any rest if she is in the bed. But the times we’ve had house guests we’ve had no choice and it was pretty insane. Our cat was here first and so he gets precedence. Out of respect for him, the puppy has to stay out of the bedroom. As guilty as this makes me feel sometimes.
Most people that commented they don’t sleep with their dog DID say they sleep with their cat. Chester and Gretel are the size of cats so it’s kinda the same 🙂
The last picture the one on the left. Snoop in crook of my leg and GG at my tummy. They can’t sleep any other way and after two years I can’t either. We keep each other warm and cozy!
It’s funny how they find “their spots” and then it becomes “our spots”….at least they way they see it because they are not sleeping with us in our bed – we are sleeping with them in their bed. Ha, ha.
I sleep in my own comfy bed right on the floor next to mommy – I have done that since the night she brought me home. We both have our own space and are close enough. Sometimes we think about me sleeping in bed but since it works as is, I leave the bed to mom and the kitties.
Well, you would take up more space than Chester and Gretel and would probably crowd your Mom and the kitties out 🙂
They look fine. If mine did sleep with me (they used to) it would be 1 and 3. They sleep in their crate and are very happy to do so. Sometimes they will nap with me on the couch, and the odd time on the bed.
Oh, Chester and Gretel have their designated spots when we lay on the couch too 🙂
BOL!! Great drawings for using a computer at 5 am!! In Summer I sleep under the bed. In Winter I sleep with my tushie smushed up against Mom’s backside. BOL!!
UNDER the bed? I hope your Mom has a cuddly dog bed under there for you. I imagine it can get hot sleeping with your Mom is the summer because you have so much hair.
Ha! This made me laugh out loud. Pretty cute and just goes to show that you don’t need to try too hard to be funny.
I think the less I try, the funnier I usually am 🙂
I love that Chester has HIS spot. This is about the same here, but Eleanor is the in “middle” and I’m hanging off the side of the bed.
Ha, ha. There IS a variation on one of these where I am hanging off the bed too 🙂
Haha I love it! Nola moves around a lot a night; from behind my knees, to against my stomach, behind my neck, on my pillow….
I love it when I open my eyes and Gretel’s head is on my pillow and she is staring back at me. Makes me giggle 🙂 I bet it is the same with Eleanor.
Hey Chester, Hey Gretel, Jet here.
LOVED this post… Mom asked me to share she can totally relate. When Puffy and Fluffy were alive, she had all 4 of us on the bed… she’s tired right now or she would describe or dare we suggest… draw?
It’s strangely liberating to know your drawing will suck and make pretty much zero effort to try and make it not suck. It’s actually more fun to see how sucky you can make it while still getting your point across. Ha, ha.
We slept with 6 Doxies in our bed once. That’s kind of like 4 medium dogs so I know what it must have felt like for your Mom 🙂
Typist was thinking how artistic you are!
Ha!Ha! Love the drawings! With two basset hounds, hubby and I just hang off the sides of the bed. LOL!
I LOVE them! Molly got to sleep with me the other night, which I rarely let happen. I wish she cuddled more, but usually she just curls up at the end of the bed under the covers. She will come out throughout the night and shake and wap her ears. Usually whipping me in the face with her tail!
I thought you did pretty good and its a miracle you can get any sleep. 🙂
Yes! Our house is all of those drawings at different points during the night. Darn rowdy sleepers!
YES! This is exactly how my doxie sleeps. I love the one where he’s in the middle of the pillow! They definitely keep you warm on cold nights.
LOL. Those pictures cracked me up. I’ve experienced all those as well as them laying horizontal and hogging the covers. Unfortunately, my dogs no longer sleep with us due to competing egos. 🙁
That is hilarious! I think part of why it’s so funny is because I have been there — just about every night!
My favorite is the doxie sleeping on his back with his head on the pillow. Make that hound 5 times bigger and color it black and there is my greyhound Bettina.
I have a chihuahua/weenie. He’s mostly weenie but with long legs. As you can imagine that leads to a lot of trouble since he can jump.
He sleeps in every position you have illustrated. We tried a crate but he would cry or somehow escape and end up in our bed. He is supposed to sleep at the bottom of the bed but there have been countless times I have woken in the middle of the night to find that I am sharing a pillow and blanket with him.
I can imagine how funny/startling it is to wake up, roll over and be face-to-face with a dog. Gretel does thing thing where she starts by my back or legs, eventually skoots to the bottom of the bed, jumps out from underneath the covers (maybe to cool off?) and then comes back around for me to pick her up. Half the time when I do she snuggles on my pillow before repeating the routine.
Thankfully Chewy has those long legs so he can jump back in the bed without waking me up if he gets down. The worst is that long cold nose in my face when he has decided he’s cold and wants back under the covers after crawling out. I do love my little devilish heating pad though. Lol
Oh yes, can I relate! The two we have now aren’t as much into cuddling, but our Gretchie and Flash (“twin” black and tans) sure were. Gretchie would sleep between me and hubby, with her head buried into one of us and her fanny into the other. Flash would sleep on the edge, but had to be between the covers and the sheet. Made a challenge some nights, but we sure stayed warm and cozy!
We love to cuddle with ours. We laid in bed and cuddled them for an extra half hour before getting up this morning 🙂 I know what you mean about the sheets. Sometimes one of them gets in between the sheets and the blanket and it makes it very hard for me to move around.
This cracked me up! Great drawing skills, especially for 5 o’clock in the morning! Just found your blog and am loving it- super entertaining! Wish I lived in Seattle so I could attend all the fun events:)
It look like our bed at night 🙂